regret and positive thinking

I have often heard people say they have no regrets about their lives and would do it all again. I have always thought this meant that people just didn't care if what they did was wrong or right. Lately I have realized that maybe what they were saying was they have lived a life in which they never did anything bad enough to regret.

As I type this I am leaning more toward the former. I mean, it's pretty impossible to live a life in which you never do a single thing that you regret. Or maybe they mean they have forgiven themselves for regrettable actions in the past and moving forward they will not do things they might regret?

Similarly, I have recently realized that positive thinking effects my life much more directly than I had thought. I had thought of it as some sort of supernatural thing or some impossible-to-understand theory having to do with the vibrations we send out attracting similar vibrations. However, I suddenly realize that it's much simpler than that.

occurence leads to thought, thought determines emotion, emotion determines quality of day

When I'm having a bad day it is because I am feeling a negative emotion. I'm angry about something or sad or anxious or upset somehow.

When I am feeling a negative emotion it is my body physiologically reacting to a negative thought I had about something that occurred which I labeled in my mind as "bad".

THEREFORE - If I can avoid labeling things in my mind as "bad" I can avoid negative emotion, thereby making a better day for myself.

So the key is "thinking positive"...which is what they have been saying all along!

my things are not who I am

Times are tight financially right now for my family. We have been forced to drastically change our lifestyle. We took Harper out of day care since at least one of us is always at home to watch her. We have given notice at our lovely townhouse in Irvine and will be moving into an apartment in a less expensive part of Orange County. I am selling my beautiful car and preparing to buy a much less expensive but practical one. We have started going without luxuries to which we had been accustomed, such as Disneyland passports, acting classes, mani/pedis, and the like.

Suprisingly enough, what I am finding is that this makes absolutely no difference in my happiness level. Owning and doing all those things were supposed to make us happier and take our lives to a new level of enjoyment. I am just as happy now as I was then. Happier even. I am looking forward to moving out of this place which is a drain on the pocketbook. Though it's nice, it isn't ideal for us. There are no little neighbors for Harper to play with here. There is no sense of community among neighbors. In fact in the four years we've been here we have never met our neighbors. I am looking forward to selling my car, another drain on the pocketbook. It will be such a relief to have that money each month to put toward credit card bills and savings. Rather than making us happy, without us even realizing it, our possessions have been like a black cloud over our heads.

I am becoming a firm believer in "travelling light". I will be credit card debt free within two or three years and I plan on NEVER having another credit card.

I am finding that the glorious life is already here. It's not about possessions, materialistic luxuries and such. It's about living each day. Truly living. Being present for my life. Yes, having nice things is good in some ways. Quality things don't break down, they are dependable and convenient, and that's great - IF you can afford it. But if you can't really afford it, all it does is add to your worry by creating debt that hangs over your head.

So someday I plan on having a nice new car again. Someday we'll live in a nice home with all the amenities we want. But only when we can truly afford it. Until then, we will learn to live within our means. To truly LIVE within our means. And that's a great thing!!

Too many cooks in the kitchen?

I know I am weird, but sometimes I worry about things like this:

I love Tolle's philosophy and I totally believe he's right. The more I get into it, the more I want to connect with other people who are into it. So I started to check out a couple of forums that discuss Tolle. BUT... I saw some stuff on there that worried me. People giving advice that doesn't seem to be quite right.

What if the other people unintentionally inject some kind of germ into it so that it's not pure anymore?

Is it better for me to just read and study on my own, and not complicate things by bringing others into the circle? Is there such a thing as too many cooks in the kitchen?

These are the silly things I worry about.

I have been busy so I'm not posting as often as I'd like. If anyone is reading anyway???